It's Not Just Trauma

The way I am is not simply explained by having cPTSD or lacking minerals. I am #actuallyautistic. There are many people who believe they can “cure” autism. Process your trauma and detox and you’ll be alright. Ok. But I am not trying to be cured. I am autistic. It is an integral part of my identity and I have been autistic since birth. The reason why people seek a cure to autism is because autism is perceived to be a negative, unwanted thing. Any new parent can relate to not wanting to “mess up your kid” by taking the wrong prescriptions or doing the wrong thing during pregnancy. Autism is high on the list of fears for new parents. The wish to cure autism is rooted in ableism. It is implied that to have a neuronormative brain is preferable. I don’t agree. There are pros and cons to any neurotype. It is all a matter of opinion. Although it has its ups and downs, I love being the way I am. My pattern recognition skills are off the chain and I am incredibly perceptive. It is such an interesting experience being myself while surrounded by neurotypicality that doesn’t understand me. But I wouldn’t have it any other way. In our society, we believe that to be “traumatized” and neurodivergent are inherently undesirable things. We joke about having PTSD all the time as a way to say that we are “messed up.” I wouldn’t wish trauma on anyone but the traumas I have experienced have deepened my understanding of life. I wouldn’t trade them just like I wouldn’t trade being autistic. My experiences have become a part of myself. There is no mineral or trauma treatment that will erase the fact that I am autistic. Nothing will erase my experience of trauma either. Can certain practices make these conditions more bearable? For sure. Can you cure them? Not so sure. And I am not planning on trying to.