Autistic People Are Worried You Will Misunderstand Them

Black text with white background: "Hey therapists, psychologists, mental health professionals: Autistic people are worried that you will misunderstand them. @myautistictherapist"

was looking through my blog on my website the other day and I realized, wow, I have been talking about Autism for quite a long time! As someone who works with Autistic people every day in both groups and individually, I hear a lot about Autistic people’s experiences in the mental health space. In fact, a lot of people seek me out with a sense of desperate hope that finally they will be understood by someone who works in mental health and actually understands what being Autistic means.

If you are a mental health professional in any capacity, I want you to know that Autistic people are wary of people like me and you. And for good reason. They are concerned that we might misunderstand them as so many have done before us. The mental health system has failed so many Autistic people, let’s face it. From misdiagnosis, to invalidation, to infantilization, to grueling assessments with little to no compassion or support, it’s rough out there.

If I could sum up what I’ve learned from listening to Autistic people, it’s that we want people to listen to us. We want people to actually want to know what our experience is like and then TAKE IT SERIOUSLY. We want someone who knows about Autism beyond just what we tell them, we want guidance and support in learning how to be compassionate toward ourselves and to take own needs seriously. Because we masked our needs for so long and now we don’t know even what they are. We need help figuring all that out.

As clinicians, this means that we need to learn about Autism and we need to continue to learn about Autism. We need to understand the depth of pain that an isolated, mistreated, neglected Autistic person can experience. And we need to hold space and respect for the grief that Autistic people experience as they navigate disability, lack of family support, etc. We are tired of receiving help that doesn’t even feel good, that always comes with a cringey ableist comment like “everyone’s a little Autistic" just because the therapist doesn't understand how hurtful and invalidating a comment like that is. We are tired of being misunderstood. #actuallyautistic#autistictherapist